Missing Mom

One year

A lot can happen in one year. There is plenty of evidence of that when you look at Ally. A year ago she could just barely sing Happy Birthday (and even that wasn’t terribly clear) and now she can sing almost all of the songs from Frozen. She’s gone from a toddler to a big girl. From needing us to wanting to be completely independent.

So it feels like a huge contrast to think of how little has changed in my feelings about my mom.

I often feel like she’s still here. I know what she’d say in certain situations. I know how proud she’d be of my accomplishments. Of Chris’s beautiful sets. Of Ally’s swimming and potty training.

And I’m forever thankful for the wonderful, strong family she built. I always have someone to turn to when I don’t know what to do. Someone to give me the advice she would have.

But there are still times when only mom will do. Times when I need her here to say that everything will be okay. Times when I need her to say “I know just how you feel because I’ve been through that same thing.”

Equally difficult are the times I wish she was here to experience the good with me. To see how Ally has grown. To see how brilliant, beautiful, funny and loving she has become. To witness all the milestones and excitement.

I’m sure she’s out there laughing along, sending me strength, and admiring her family.

A lot can happen in a year and, while we may be missing mom down here, hopefully she hasn’t missed a second of it!


Poem by Henry Scott Holland


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